Chapter Two: The Waiting Game

Chapter Two: The Waiting Game
"Okay God, you've called me to work Camp, which I clearly cannot afford. So I'm trusting that you will provide the money I'm lacking."

And so I waited for the money to start pouring in.
And I waited.
And I waited,
February passed. March passed. April passed. May passed. And other than the few babysitting jobs I got, there was no money pouring in. I was excited for Camp to start in June, but I began to question my decision.

"Did I make the wrong choice? Will I have enough money to go to school? God, I thought you were taking care of this. It's been months and I haven't seen any money come in."

During this time, we began to go through a sermon series on faith in church. This series was both an encouragement and challenge to me as I asked these tough questions. When I got together with my bible study and we talked about what we had learned from the sermons, and always on my mind was my decision about my summer. Whether I shared about it, or just thought about it, I was always pondering my continued faith in trusting God for money. Because I was still waiting. But I still knew God was in control.

Through those couple weeks I got the opportunity to share my story with several groups of people hoping that God would use it somehow to inspire faith in their own lives. And slowly, I did see it impact people.

But I was still waiting for money. And as the first couple weeks of Camp passed, the reality hit that I had less than one month before I had to pay the first bill for school. And I began to panic.

"God, you are faithful. I am trusting you to provide the money that I don't have. What are you doing? Why are you waiting. Are you going to provide it? Or do you not want me to go to school in the fall. If that's your will, let it be. But I have worked so hard to finally be able to go on campus. I want it so bad. Please allow me to go. Please provide he money in time. I have no plan B. If you don't provide it, I've got nothing."

And as God often tends to do, just when I was starting to question his faithfulness again, He gently reminded me that He will never fail me. He reminded me that having no plan B was just where he wanted me. He was most glorified through my life when I was most dependent on Him!

How did he remind me of this? Well, one evening before I left from Bible study, a friend handed me an envelope. I was confused because I had no idea why she would have anything to give me, but I stuck it in my purse to open when I got home. One I arrived back home, I pulled the envelope out and opened it. Inside was a note that read something like, "Your faith is inspiring. Hope this helps with school." I reached back into the envelope, baffled at what the note meant. As I reached in, my hand felt another piece of paper which I pulled out. I looked at it in awe as I realized it was a check for a thousand dollars.

My heart began to pound, and my eyes began to fill with tears. "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! God, you did it! You really are faithful! How could I doubt you? Oh my goodness! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"

I was baffled. I had heard of things like this happening to people, but I never thought it'd happen to me. I thought that God would provide money through a job, or through a few dollars here and there, but I never thought He'd be able to just hand me a check. That is the moment when God reminded me that He is God. He is in control of all the money in the world. He is the richest man alive. And if I need money, He has no trouble providing it. He can do anything. And I don't always have to strive to work hard enough to earn it either. Sometimes He will provide a job for me to earn money with. But sometimes He just wants me to stop striving, rest in Him, and watch Him do something amazing.

He reminded me that He is my Father. And I am his daughter. I am like a little three year old girl looking up in awe at her daddy saying, "Daddy, do a magic trick! Daddy, do a magic trick!" And like the most wonderful Daddy of all, my heavenly Father swoops me up in His arms and delights in doing amazing things as my eyes widen with wonder and I run to tell all my little friends how awesome my daddy is. My heavenly Daddy delights in providing for me. And He is glorified when I stop trying to do it myself and just watch Him in awe!

And I did tell all my little friends what my heavenly Daddy did. I was so excited about it. How could I hold it in? I delighted in sharing my story and watching others people's eyes widen in wonderment too! I found joy in seeing my story inspire faith in them too.

And as I shared my story with one child of God, she shared one of the wisest pieces of advice I've heard in a long time. "You know, I bet that the closer and closer it gets to the time you have to pay your school bills, the longer God's gonna wait to provide, so that you learn to depend on Him more." And it has been true. Each time God provides, He stretches my dependence on Him even more. He is faithful, but He will not allow me to become comfortable in my awe of Him. He wants me to grow ever closer to Him as I depend on Him more and more.